Mike Valeri from Lampert Capital Markets just called me.  He said we spoke a long time ago and that I said I already had too many brokers in New York.

Of course, both of these are untrue statements.  First, Mike Valeri has only been registered since October.  So his definition of a “long time ago” must be different than mine.

Second, because we never spoke, there’s no way I could have told him that I had too many brokers in New York, since I have no brokers in New York and haven’t had any brokers in New York in close to 20 years.

Then he asked me if I had an account with John Thomas Financial, which I didn’t.

He then told me that he must have the wrong guy.  At least he got that right.

Good luck with your cold-calling career, Mike.  Maybe you could get a job as a storyteller, too.

I know, I know. Where is the curmudgeon? He’s taking a rest. Actually, I’m not that much of a curmudgeon, it’s just that stuff has put me in a bad mood lately.

But tonight I will be a speaker at a Palm Beach Bar Association Young Lawyers’ Section seminar on various topics. One of them will be social networking. And I intend to refer people to my blog to find this link on the ABA website to help them use LinkedIn better.

So, if you want to see the 14 tips for using LinkedIn created by the ABA, click here. This way I don’t have to incorporate all 14 tips into a slideshow and read them aloud (which is a no-no anyway).

That’s the view of one lawyer from sun-drenched Jupiter, Palm Beach County, Florida. I continue to be Marc Dobin.

When we reopened Dobin Law Group in 2010 (then known as Marc S. Dobin, P.A.), we moved into an office suite setup in Jupiter. There were prior tenants in the space. One of the prior tenants was Lloyds Commodities. These were not luxurious quarters.

After we moved in, we inherited the Lloyds phone number. We would occasionally get a phone call asking how to send in account documentation. The people who called did not really seem to have much of a clue. And it didn’t make sense that they would be buying physical commodities. But it wasn’t my job to warn them. One thing always troubled me, though. I never like it when a business chooses a name that seems to have nothing to do with their business but everything to do with trying to earn credibility by being confused with another established business.

There was a Ponzi scheme in West Palm Beach, Pheonix Investments. It was accused of trading on the confusion between its name and Phoenix Mutual Funds. Eventually the Ponzi scheme unraveled and the mutual fund company sued Pheonix for unfair competition or something like that.

In this case, why Lloyds? How about subliminally convincing people that the business is associated with Lloyd’s of London? People don’t ask. And if they do, I have no idea what answer was given. But it doesn’t matter.

The Palm Beach Post reports that Lloyds and its owners (neither of whom were named Lloyd) were ordered to pay about $5 million in penalties and restitution. I doubt any of that money will ever be seen, but who knows.

I wrote last month that it was not looking good for the folks who advocate for an all-public arbitration panel.  But I knew I had to wait until the publication of the year-end figures to be sure.  And now I’m sure, at least for this year.  Here they are.  The percentages remain unchanged.  Nine “all-public” cases and five “majority public” cases were decided in December.  The results did not change the percentages.

I repeat.  This turned out to be window dressing.  Of course, there could be any number of factors that resulted in skewed results in favor or opposition to my assertion.  But the fact remains that the “win” rate for customers is statistically even regardless of the panel composition in the year 2013.  Keep in mind that, for the most part, these would be panels that were selected in 2012.

But I have said before, I do not draw huge conclusions from this.  There are too many variables to beat my chest and say “I was right” no matter how tempted I may be.  But the fact remains that the PIABA folks will now say that the system is unfair simply because it exists.  I’m reminded of the Black Knight in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  So reminded, in fact, that I am putting it here. Make sure to click on the image to get the full clip.

When you hear or read someone say “Arbitration is still unfair, no matter what the statistics” just say in your head “I’ll bite your legs off.”

That’s the view of one lawyer in Jupiter, Palm Beach County, Florida. I’m Marc Dobin (and not the Black Knight).